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ALL:
We're ladies-in-waiting,
In waiting to the King,
As ladies-in-waiting
We're on the spot
Because we've got
To give the King
Ev'rything.
FIRST GIRL:
I give him his breakfast,
Served in royal state.
SECOND GIRL:
I give him his soda
Bicarbonate.
THIRD GIRL:
And when he wants funsy-wunsy,
When he wants funsy-wunsy--
FIRST, SECOND AND THIRD GIRL:
Pray, what do you give him?
THIRD GIRL:
I give him the gate!
SECOND GIRL:
I give him his haircut,
In his golden chair.
THIRD GIRL:
I give him his wig 'cause
There ain't no hair.
FIRST GIRL:
And when he wants candy-wandy,
When he wants candy-wandy--
FIRST, SECOND AND THIRD GIRL:
Pray, what do you give him?
FIRST GIRL:
I give him the air!
ALL:
We're ladies-in-waiting,
In waiting to the King,
As ladies-in-waiting
We're on the spot
Because we've got
To give the King
Ev'rything.
THIRD GIRL:
I carry his snuffbox
When he gives a dance.
FIRST GIRL:
I shoulder his gun when
He fights for France.
SECOND GIRL:
And when he wants tiddly-widdly,
When he wants tiddly-widdly--
FIRST, SECOND AND THIRD GIRL:
Pray, what do you give him?
SECOND GIRL:
A kick in the pants!
ALL:
We're ladies-in-waiting,
In waiting to the King,
As ladies-in-waiting
We're on the spot
Because we've got
To give the King
Ev'rything.
FIRST GIRL:
I give him his diet
When too fat he grows.
SECOND GIRL:
I tighten his corset
When still it shows.
FIRST GIRL:
And when he wants foodle-doodle,
When he wants foodle-doodle--
Pray, what do you give him?
SECOND GIRL:
A punch in the nose!
ALL:
We're ladies-in-waiting,
In waiting to the King,
As ladies-in-waiting
We're on the spot
Because we've got
To give the King
Ev'rything.
SECOND GIRL:
I fill him with brandy
When the weather's raw.
FIRST GIRL:
I sober him up
When it starts to thaw.
SECOND GIRL:
And when he wants nizzle-nozzle,
When he wants nizzle-nozzle--
Pray, what do you give him?
FIRST GIRL:
A sock in the jaw!
ALL:
We're ladies-in-waiting,
In waiting to the King,
As ladies-in-waiting
We're on the spot
Because we've got
To give the King
Ev'rything.
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