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SISTER CHANTELLE
Peter! Peter!
PETER
Fuck me!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Lovely intro
KYRA & TANYA
Watch your mouth, boy!
SISTER CHANTELLE
You need more help than I thought
PETER
What’s that supposed to mean?
SISTER CHANTELLE
Listen up, Peter
I may be a virgin but I ain’t new to the game
Don’t be frontin' with Mary
PETER
Holy shit!
SISTER CHANTELLE
I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.
KYRA & TANYA
Think it over.
PETER
Hail Mary full of grace
SISTER CHANTELLE
Stop, stop, stop!
Do you know how tired I am of that prayer?
What do you know about 2,000 years
And they still be saying the same prayer
KYRA & TANYA
Change is comin’ – it’s comin’!
SISTER CHANTELLE
I have a message for you, Peter
KYRA & TANYA
Listen closely
SISTER CHANTELLE
Now where’d I put it? All these pockets...
Oh yeah, here it is!
KYRA & TANYA
Seek and ye shall find
SISTER CHANTELLE
“You shall know the truth and it shall…”
Who writes this stuff?
KYRA & TANYA
Too generic
SISTER CHANTELLE
Never mind, I’m just gonna wing it
TANYA
Mary loves her puns
SISTER CHANTELLE
Now, I saw what you just did
KYRA & TANYA
Mary saw you
SISTER CHANTELLE
Seems the love that dare not speak its name done gone ahead and spoke
KYRA & TANYA
Now the secret’s out
SISTER CHANTELLE
You tell one person – that’s it – cat’s out of the bag
KYRA & TANYA
Will he keep it?
SISTER CHANTELLE
There’s a phone call that’s now overdue to your mother, baby
KYRA & TANYA
Time to call her up
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Get on mama’s line
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Heaven knows it's time.
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Can you put him through?
ALL THREE
Someone’s got a job to do
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Mama loves you, boy
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
You’re her pride and joy
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Get the doing done
ALL THREE
Reach out, baby – touch someone
911! Emergency! Time to be a grown up
We done gone and made the call – you need to pick the phone up
Ring your mother, tell it all, go ahead and own up
Stop your lying, drop the drama
Tell the world but first tell mama
Let her know!
SISTER CHANTELLE
I’ve read the books, Peter
KYRA & TANYA
Oprah picked ‘em
SISTER CHANTELLE
Sayin’ “Come out when you’re ready”
But don’t talk about it - be about it!
KYRA & TANYA
Come on, come on out, boy
SISTER CHANTELLE
Cause life is now, sugar
KYRA & TANYA
Gotta live your life
SISTER CHANTELLE
Don’t hide there under a bushel...
Or whatever my baby used to say
KYRA & TANYA
Jesus knows what’s up
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Help the boy connect
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Let him call collect
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Can you put him through?
ALL THREE
Someone’s got a job to do
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Got to change the plan
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Time to take a stand
KYRA & TANYA
Operator!
SISTER CHANTELLE
Get the doing done
ALL THREE
Reach out, baby, touch someone
911! Emergency! Time to be a grown up
We done gone and made the call – you need to pick the phone up
Ring your mother, tell it all, go ahead and own up
Mop your mess up, drop the drama.
Tell the world but first tell mama.
911! Emergency! Life is full of choices
Baby, here’s a 411: with truth the world rejoices
Let it out, let mama in, boy, you need to hear the voices
Stop the secrets, drop the drama
Roll it out but first tell mama
Let her know!
SISTER CHANTELLE
That’s it. God bless.
PETER
But is it okay if I’m not sure… (?)
SISTER CHANTELLE
Uh-uh! No questions
This isn’t “Conversations with Mary”
KYRA & TANYA
It ain’t that book, baby
SISTER CHANTELLE
You’ll figure it out
And I’m on the tightest of schedules
Work, work, work, save, save, save
So many in need
But does the head of the first family lift a wing to help?
NO! Joseph be telling me
“I let you ride the donkey all the way to Bethlehem”
Now that was 2,000 years ago, ok?
I’m talkin’ about what has he done for me lately?
KYRA & TANYA
(Talking rapidly, I can’t understand them)
SISTER CHANTELLE
Keep back! Keep back! (?)
And I know two ladies who about to be touched by an angel
Get that now? [Smacks someone?]
We out!
[Kyra gives Peter a cell phone on their way out]
ALL THREE
911! Emergency! Time to be a grown up
We done gone and made the call – you need to pick the phone up
Ring your mother, tell it all, go ahead and own up
Stop your lying, drop the drama
Tell the world but first tell mama
Let her know!
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